I DO know myself, and I know that I do not want 5 or 7 kids. So why is it, then, after meeting two wonderfully sweet mothers, of 5 and 7 children, do I feel like half the mothers they are? Is it because mom of 7 brought them all to the same park I was at this morning, cradling her 2.5 week old baby and rocking her 120 lb body.....and her TWO sets of twins? Is it because mom of 5 just so happens to be the woman who BUILT the house I'm living in and totally in love with? Is it because people who know I'm a Christian and a licensed teacher automatically assume I will home school my children (this just happened last week....a kind stranger warned me of the danger of the world, meaning public school).
I'm all for large families and home-schooling. In fact I'm kind of lost since "19Kids and Counting" isn't on TLC this summer. I wish I were more like Michelle Duggar, minus about 16 kids.
But I know myself. I know that I would not be a good mom to 7 kids. At all. Thinking about making 6 meals, breast feeding the baby, then feeding myself and my husband, not once but three times day, not to mention trying to spend time with each kids and maintain a relationship with Hubs....It's not my cup of tea.
There are days I feel like I'm barely keeping my head above water with my three little ones. I comfort myself with images of t-ball, soccer, and kindergarten . Public school kindergarten. We have such a great school system here that I look forward to the day I can work in it, even a little.
I am privileged to stay home with my boys now. Hats off to you mamas who are working outside the home, or did, during theses early years. I likewise couldn't imagine myself doing that, either. So don't go thinking I'm all dying to get back to work, either.
I know myself. Sometimes I just have to remind myself that who I am is okay. Thank the Lord He did not choose me to have 7, or homeschool, or work through the early years. He knows me better than I know myself. And I'm a pretty good mom, all things considered.